I wrote a letter to a friend for his 40th birthday. Dear ______: You’ve been described as a man of words, and yet it has also been said “What is the good of words if they aren't important enough to quarrel over? The Church and the heresies always used to fight about words, because they are the only thing worth fighting about.” [GKC] You and I have had our share of [good] quarrels over words; I can remember a midnight discussion in our living room so many years ago, and I can remember one this morning – generous quarrels founded on a shared exploration. For these moments I am eternally grateful! So here are some more words. "The first fact about the celebration of birthdays is that it is a good way of affirming defiantly, and even flamboyantly, that it is a good thing to be alive.” [GKC] I suppose I should begin with "Happy Birthday" ... possibly one of the worst of platitudes because it says everything and nothing about our lives. A birthday event marks the boundary between a past of confusing memories and a future of uncertain moments, which together encompass a life of asking “why?” Age is an interesting concept, especially for the Christian who lives in allegiance to the ageless one, the one who seems far, far more interested in the "what" of our lives than the "when". This seems all the more odd to me since we are paradoxically created for both time and eternity. So what does age really mean, let alone 40 years of age? There are a wide range of metrics that we can use to tell your age, but which should we choose? We could measure your age by the simple chronological counter (you are 40), but that seems a rather inadequate measure for a life filled with such rich complexity. Maybe we should measure your age by accomplishments (you’ve done so much); relationships (I feel like I've known you for such a long time); physical abilities (hmm, you can't run quite as far as you used to); visual appearance (wow, you don't look much older than when we first met); influence on others (your wisdom is sought out); social status (you have titles and a respected standing in the community); power (your exercise of authority has grown so much); or any number of other measures. Yet, as measured on a ruler of eternity, none of these measures go visibly beyond zero. Against infinity's measure your age does not even register - you are in fact ageless! The only marker of time in our lives that has any significance is birth. For as physical birth is the beginning of experience, so spiritual birth is the beginning of eternity. Thus your birthday is important because it is a reminder of your birth-day ... a reminder of your beginning in time. Making an event out of this “moment of remembrance” is not to make you feel old, but is to remind both of us of the “remembrance of moments”. For as eternity's perspective reduces our ages to naught and all of our past collapses to a point, so time becomes irrelevant and we remember not what happened when, but only what happened. The “What” to remember the most is when the "Why" was answered. Until that moment life was lived under a tyrant of time who measured age on a ruler of three score and ten. Then the “why” changed understanding, and the ruler measured infinity. It is said that a shared understanding brings systemic change, and so when the eternal ruler shared an understanding, he collapsed all ages into a moment and our eternity began. And so, in 2017, in a year of global and local seismic shifts that may seem to shake our foundations, perhaps it is best to remember that “The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him.” [GKC] Behind you is all that has led to the strong measures which the world and I attribute to you, but most important of all is the measure that made your age irrelevant. So fall forward Let it mark your soul Keep your heart tender And your thoughts bold
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Why?
Probably the best therapy is to express yourself. Why do you think psychiatrists make you lie on the couch and talk, while all they do is murmur "hmmm", "uhuh", or "go on"? Archives
May 2017
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